Getting Older

Everyone talks about how getting older is hard due to piling responsibilities and bills, but they don’t talk about how hard it is to grow distant from those you love and to slip away from things you used to enjoy as schedules seem to suffocate you.

You go from spending all your days singing in the car or in the library at 1 am with all your best friends, then you fast forward a few months and you have to scratch your head and think hard about the last time you even saw most of them.

It’s a sinking feeling. It hurts twice as bad when you feel that your efforts to keep the quickly dying embers burning aren’t reciprocated or go unnoticed. The coals are growing cold and no one seems to care that you’re breaking your back to stoke them.

I’ve also been walking through a joint season of busyness and burnout, something that has come with its own confusion. In high school I played multiple sports and took most AP classes. I was moving at 100 miles per hour from sun up to sundown with no problem. So why now as an adult does getting through the workday suck every ounce of energy from me, leaving me begging for a rest that’s more than physical? It’s called burnout. I can’t remember for the life of me, but recently I heard someone say that burnout isn’t caused by busyness but idleness. Boy let me tell you, they hit that nail on the head. Working from 8-5 every day isn’t what wears me down, sitting at my desk behind a computer screen for the majority of the day when I have numerous undone tasks at home is. Getting home and being mentally and socially drained but not taking an opportunity to rest in His presence intensifies this exhaustion. How can I expect to run on empty?

1 Peter 1:5-9 encourages us to be productive Christians and the parable of the talents in Matthew 25 teaches us the importance of making good on what God has entrusted to us. Being too tired to carry on a conversation with a coworker (one that could easily turn into a gospel conversation) or being too tired to read my bible or be a present friend is not being a productive Christian and it is not making good use of my spiritual gifts.

So yeah life is busy, but it’s a different and more dangerous kind of busy. This isn’t an excuse; it’s a reminder to stay awake and stay alert.

The enemy shows up in all kinds of ways, including in our tiredness. Remember to rest in the arms of the Father. I write this as a reminder to myself, having been stuck in this spot for the last several months.

Anxiety and worry are constant and high. Sleep, energy and motivation are low. This is where satan gets a foothold - don’t let him!

There are seasons for things and there are seasons for people; A concept I’ve had a hard time wrestling with recently.

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So what do you do? Well, I don’t really know.

But I’ll tell you what I do know:

1. It’s never wrong to be a good friend

• check in on them if you miss them

• pray for them

• be patient with them; life is busy! (Proverbs 17:17)

2. Talk to God

• tell Him you’re lonely

• tell Him you’re hurting

• let His unwavering presence comfort you

3. Prioritize time with God in His word

• Tell Him you're tired and desire rest

• Share your anxieties and worries with Him (1 Peter 5:7)

The feelings you’re having could very well be the same feelings those you miss are having, and they don’t have a lot of time to express them either. You’ll never regret being a good friend, so always be the friend you wish to have!

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Life is looking a lot different for me recently and it’s definitely taking me for a spin. I wish I could say I was handling the transitions a little more gracefully but there’s no point in trying to put glitter on dirt. it’s messy, and I’m learning.

I pray that whatever season you’re in right now that you’re allowing yourself to learn with grace! Rest in the fact that God walks with you and He’s already gone before you, and oh yeah - He’s taken care of the mess behind you too. He’s the definition of constant, steady and faithful—the best friend who will never leave or abandon us. (Hebrews 10:23)

Be the kind of friend Jesus is and thank God we get to be in communion with Him!